Annoying Utterances

“Thank you for calling. Your call is very important to us. All of our associates are busy serving other customers. Please stay on the line and your call will be answered in the order received”.

Translation: “We’ve put you on indefinite hold, and won’t tell you where you are in the queue or your expected wait time. We don’t want to spend a lot of money on staff since that cuts into our profits. So you get to listen to prerecorded music with frequent repetitions of this message until you get frustrated and hang up. If you do get through, you’re going to talk to someone sitting in a call center halfway around the world who will spend the first five minutes verifying your identity. We know that we have no competition, so you’re going to have to deal with us on our terms. Sucka!” More at the New York Times

That darn squirrel

He really is very photogenic. More here.

Meerkat Cubicle

Chris Weyant

Portable Moose Head.

Yes, Portable Moose Head. Yes, someone sells them. You never know when they'll come in handy. Stock up today!

The Great Squirrel Uprising of 2007

They're out there. Beware.

No Frills

I used to love the Carol Burnett Show as a kid and this is a particularly hilarious skit:

And now, the Fez

I bought one of these for my cat, Empress Frida. After putting it on her head, she gave me the "we are not amused look."

After 15 seconds she knocked it off.

Three days later, I found it chewed up and in rags behind the sofa.

When all else fails, wear a tie or break out in song

Okay, kids. Where are the comments?